I think we can all speak to a workplace or school setting issue. Some are small and give us something to laugh about over drinks with our friends. Others are more damaging and end up bad for all parties involved. The handling of these workplace or school setting issues mostly depends on the level of maturity or tolerance of the receivers. Some people can take a lot and never explode. Not that this is healthy, but they have learned the art of avoiding confrontations or turning ugly situations into mild happenings that never get a second thought. I so admire those people.

There is nothing more fulfilling than having someone perform a personal service for you that leaves you feeling like your money and time were well spent. In the past, I have had many experiences where I felt like I should have just stayed at home. The actual services were poor and those providing them were unwelcoming, unpolished and unprofessional. I vowed to never spend my money wherever nor whenever I was feeling unsatisfied. So I was overly excited when I settled into a salon where I was completely happy. I was happy with the physical environment, the services received and the service providers. It was a win all the way around. With the exception of the COVID-19 shutdown, I was faithful. No matter what, there I was spending lots of money on bi-weekly nail services. This went on for over two years before my bubble was burst-loudly!

I was on a virtual work call about a week ago. Go figure, right? Everything is virtual these days. There were approximately fifty people on the call. We could see the faces of some, while others had their cameras off. As many of you know, while being on these virtual calls we have the opportunity to type in our names as we see fit. Given that the calls are work-related, we generally enter our first and last names along with our preferred pronouns. The thing is, if we do not know people, we do not know exactly what prefix we should use. Should we say Mrs., Ms. Dr., etc? This is always a struggle for me because people are sensitive about how you address them.

While vacationing, I was sitting near a group of ladies who were enjoying life kid and spouse free. Their conversation started off by thanking God there were no children at the pool. They moved on to a conversation about traveling with the kids then on to giving other advice. There was one in the group who obviously had not traveled with her family. Her friends were eager to tell her the dos and don’ts about family travel, which was cool because we can all use some tips and tricks for better travel, especially when it comes to children. The conversation suddenly moved to the ladies making comments about what their friend who hadn’t traveled with her family should be doing in her life and with her finances…

“Self-Destruction” will never be played without a gang of laughs from my family. There’s a whole story behind the song that we will never forget. Although I cringe then laugh whenever I hear it, it’s a really dear song that will always hold special memories for me. Outside of my personal ordeal with it, I love that line where D-Nice says “Stop the violence and kick the science.” All we wanted when that song was released was a conscious brother giving us the business, especially if he was looking good while doing it. Sound knowledge and good advice – things we tend to ignore depending on who is delivering the message. It’s like the elderly man in the neighborhood who always has a story to tell. You know the one. He’s probably a war vet with thirty grandkids he’s helped to provide for..

I recently received some great news from a dear friend. I am over the top happy because she deserves the best, and there is nothing more joyous than watching the people you love succeed. In the moments after I learned of the good news, I learned something about myself. Not only did what I learn apply to me, but it applies to so many people and their situations as well. In the initial moments of hearing my friend’s good news, I had a moment. I couldn’t help but say to myself, “What about me? This is the news I want for myself.” Just as quickly as I had those thoughts, they were even more quickly overshadowed by the overwhelming feeling of happiness for my friend. This moment was hers and not mine.

After what seemed like forever, I finally made an appointment for nail service at my favorite salon. Actually, it wasn’t just the pandemic that kept me away; I had been there a few times since it began. It was more so that I just fell into a mode where I could not bring myself to do a whole lot of extra on my behalf. If it was not a required appointment, I did not bother. My new routine required me to do little for myself on the personal end. Taking the time to schedule appointments and actually attend them was a real chore. Generally speaking, appointments give me anxiety, but we’re not here to talk about that. The only appointments I cared about were my retightening appointments because my locs would be ruined otherwise. Aside from that, NADA! NOTHING!

I was thinking about a story my mom once told me. She is such a great storyteller. The important details are never left out. If she’s really into it, which is most of the time, you get voice impersonations that are usually on point! It really is an experience, and I love it. I won’t go into detail about this particular story, but it was about the consequences of regret. Too often we stress over our regrets and things we should have done. I should have gone to school here. I should have moved there. I should have pursued this. I should have been that. It can be an endless inner struggle. Quite honestly, we are sometimes guilty of bringing upon many of the unnecessary struggles in our lives.

I will never forget my first, big college heartbreak. I went through a thing! I mean this guy had taken me through the wringer. I remember being so sad and hurt that I put Mariah Carey’s “All Alone in Love” in my CD player and pressed repeat. I fell asleep listening to this heartbreaking song while my heart was literally breaking with every note. By the time I awoke the next morning, it sounded like Mariah was sitting at the edge of my bed wailing like a distressed puppy. The CD repeated that song so many times that it was tired. Seriously, the notes actually dragged and seemed to be even sadder than I was before falling asleep the night before.

My family and I were group texting, and one of us accidentally sent a message to an old chat. Someone who obviously has an old number belonging to one of my family members chimed in asking who we were. My sister sent a picture of herself, thinking one of us was joking and said, “Me!” We gagged because we had not yet caught on that this was not a family member. Once we realized this was an old phone number, they (the outsider) laughed, we laughed, then one of us apologized for our mistake. No biggie, right?

While driving home the other day, I was listening to one of my favorite shows on satellite radio. Not only is it hosted by a Bad Sister, but the topics are great too. They are funny and relevant, and I absolutely love the spin she and her cohost put on the topic of the day. On this particular show, they were talking about being okay with not getting invited. I immediately perked up because there are lots of emotions from a whole lot of people around this topic. During the show, the cohost said something that really resonated with me.

Some years ago, I went shoe shopping with one of my sisters. I have always had a great love for shoes, so this was one of my favorite things to do. I went through a phase where I would leave with three to four pairs each time. I usually had a hard time choosing just one pair, so I would convince myself to just take them all. This particular day I could not choose between a pair of shoes that came in two different colors. I didn’t necessarily want two pairs of the same shoe, not even in a different color. That was then. Now, if I like them and they’re in my size, I’m getting all colors. As I was trying to decide, I noticed two young ladies talking and having a good time. I immediately got the idea to ask them since they were the only other black girls in the store…